Happy Birthday to Me

June 13th was my birthday… And I’m not really a big birthday lover because I feel like it’s half a holiday. People always ask me “How do you feel?” and the honest answer is that I feel just like I do every other day: sleepy, bored and slightly hungover (though in this case, not from alcohol). Sooo yeah. My birthday was interesting nonetheless. I walked some of the South End and spent time evaluating my moral philosophies (and lack thereof). Anyway, I decided to compile a list (SHOCKER!). In honor of my birthday, here’s a list of 19 things I’ve learned in my 19 years of life:

1. Nothing but tens. This ideology is my latest faddish obsession. It’s important–and my duty to myself–to surround myself with nothing but tens.
Learned from: some fashion book?

2. Timing is never ideal. This one is hard to accept, but easy to see. Timing never works out perfectly, and there’s some sort of sad beauty in that. Knowing that timing isn’t on my side often motivates me to fight for things I want anyway, timing be damned.
Learned from: every dating situation ever.

3. Always wear sexy underwear. You know how people tell you to always wear clean underwear, “just in case?” I prefer to always wear sexy underwear. No one has to see it, no one has to know. But I know. And the knowledge that my unmentionables are gorgeous and sexy gives me this smirk of confidence throughout my day.
Learned from: Victoria. 

4. The answer is always yes if it makes sense. My mom used to say this to me. Whenever I wanted something, the answer was always yes, as long as I could prove that what I wanted made sense. Logic always wins out in the end.
Learned from: my ma. 

5. Integrity is first and foremost. There once was a man that lost his job because he chose to maintain his own integrity. Among many things, he helped me realize that I can’t expect others to respect me unless I respect myself.
Learned from: my dad. 

6. The most important thing in my world is me. I saw this in a documentary called “10 Questions for the Dalai Lama.” The Dalai Lama used to go around asking people what the most important thing in the world was. Responses included love, god, faith, family, life. And he laughed at them and said, “No, the most important thing in the world is you.
Learned from: The Dalai Lama, himself. 

7. Just do it. My mantra. I don’t say no to a dare, especially one that I say to myself. Telling myself to “just do it” motivates me to do things that I might not otherwise. Like walk on hot coals. And sometimes you get burned (literally and figuratively), but still…you did it.
Learned from: Nike, hot coals.

8. Sometimes family are the ones you choose. These are actually lyrics from a Vanessa Carlton song. But I learned moving to Boston that “family” has little to do with blood. I have my blood family, but I also have my sorority, my “brothers,” my Bunkers. My family is everywhere.
Learned from: mi familia, Kappa, Kappa Sigma, Bunkers, etc.

9. Love as hard as you can. And when you get nothing back? Stop. It’ll only hurt you in the long run. And there’s more to be said of investing your love in people that give it back. Or yourself, for that matter.
Learned from: chick music, personal experience.

10. Share secrets. I have a lot of secrets. But for every secret I have, there is one person who knows it. And it’s not just one person that knows them all. But there’s always someone I can turn to if I need to talk about something or I need insight and support. And since no one person knows everything, no one knows how truly psycho I am!!
Learned from: my girls.

11. When in doubt, write it out. I have a lot of unorganized thoughts rushing around in my head–my “brain barf.” It’s hard sometimes to sift through and make sense of them. But when I write, I have to turn thoughts into words into sentences into paragraphs. It’s forced organization. And oftentimes, writing helps me find the answer.
Learned from: my journal? this blog?

12. Chocolate fixes most everything. I woke up once after one of the worst partying nights ever and drunken me had slipped some chocolate into my purse in anticipation that I might need it in the morning. Chocolate is God’s medicine. It’s good frozen, melted, sweet, bitter… it’s perfect.
Learned from: drunken Marian. 

13. Always pick up 3 a.m. phone calls. They’re exciting or drunken. Either way, there are no butt calls at 3 a.m. (maybe booty calls). The late night calls are the ones from loved ones who need your support more than ever. And a little lost sleep is a small price to pay to ensure that someone’s okay.
Learned from: calls made, calls answered. 

14. Make new friends, but keep the old. Okay, I’m lame; this is actually from a Girl Scouts song. But I think it holds true. It’s important to constantly be making new friends. But keeping the old ones is important, too. I don’t know what I would do without the people with whom I grew up. Just ensure that all friends also abide by #1.
Learned from: Girl Scouts, Bo. 

15. Get out. Another lesson from Bo… I was one of the few people that got out of California for school. I left and experienced a whole new environment and lifestyle. I lived in Boston, worked in New York. And gained so much because of it. Bo, too, started in California and then moved to the South. And seeing her grow from the experience is incredible. Half of our conversations are spent discussing how stagnant everyone else from out high school is.
Learned from: Bo, Boston. 

16. Take a camera. Whoever said that photos are for people who cant make memories is crazy. Photos are phenomenal. And they somehow capture the energy and the nostalgia and the love of a moment so perfectly. And scrapbooking the photos doesn’t hurt either.
Learned from: Bo, my camera, scrapbooking. 

17. Paint you toes crazy colors. This is kind of along the same lines as #3, but when your toes are crazy, neon, happy colors, it makes you happy. No one can frown when looking at neon pink zebra toe nails (and yes, I’ve painted my toes neon pink zebra).
Learned from: O.P.I., essie, Sally Hansen, etc.

18. Accept compliments. Unless someone’s totally bullshitting you (in which case, they’re a total asshole), accept people’s compliments. It’s hard and awkward sometimes, but they’re saying it because that’s what they think. Listen, thank them, and then process it. Chances are, they’re right.
Learned from: girlfriends, Tash.

19. Hug. Sometimes I’m very tactile and emotional and cuddly. And other times, I want to shut the entire world out, curl up in a ball and be numb. But no matter, hugs make everything better. When I was in New York, no one hugged me. And it actually got to the point that my parents would have me hug myself over the phone. But either way, hugs are like chocolate; they fix (or help) most everything.
Learned from: family, Edwin.

Some cheesy, some borderline-depressing, all true. I’ve learned a lot more in my 19 years, but these all seemed appropriate and are what came out when I started typing. Happy birthday to me!

I’m not super big on cake, but I think this is the most adorable cupcake ever!